Nothing to report today

Except I took Tylenol last night (bad mom-to-be) but I feel better than I have in weeks!

Also, I am starting to feel like the fat girl again. None of my clothes are really fitting and I am completely self-conscious again. I feel like I did when I was overweight. It's a horrible feeling. I know I know.. you are all thinking - but you are pregnant. I get that. I do.

BUT, it's hard. Until I have the pregnant belly, I just think everyone is looking at me saying - wow, she should lay off the chocolate chip cookies.

Black is my new(old) favourite colour.

Hopefully I will be more optomistic tomorrow.

xo

Blah

75% of the weekend was spent in bed, trying to rid myself of this horrible headache.

Carrie and I went to a naturo-path store and I got some balm (consisting of peppermint and some other things) to put on my temples, my forehead and the back of my neck - it temporarily relieves the pain but doesn't do away with the headache. I also bought lavender and eucalyptus oil - Carrie's friend Janice swears by it but I haven't tried it yet.

Seeing as I still have a headache tonight, me thinks I will be trying it tonight.

Carrie gave me back a pair of my fat pants and I can't believe I fit them again!

No pictures yet, I actually tried to take a picture of myself in the mirror this weekend (Jeff was away on a guys weekend) but it didn't work out so hot.

We had a joint birthday party last night for my mom and Rob - Nadia came over and she's looking great, she's just 3 weeks behind me and I am praying for a safe safe pregnancy (She lost a little boy when she was 6 months pregnant last year) - I'm so happy that my sister will be off for a year with me - oh the fun to be had (Ok, maybe I am being a bit unrealistic, but better than doing it alone!)

Baby is now a sex!

Apparently, the baby is now actually a boy or a girl. All the 'parts' are formed. Part of me would LOVE to know, but the bigger part of me (and right now, that's a pretty big part) wants it to be a surprise.

I'm really only comfortable now in the next size up clothing - I think I will hit Old Navy this weekend to pick up some cheap summer weekend clothes. Last night we had Kaethe and Peter over and I didn't have any shorts that fit except these horrible gym shorts from when I was my biggest (it was either those or my size 6 shorts) so I put them much to my own disgust. Right then and there I knew this weekend had to involve shopping.

And I dont' want to spend alot of money on 'in-between' clothes.

Thyme Maternity is SO much more expensive than Motherhood - and the clothes at Motherhood are younger.... My wonderful in-laws gave me a GIFT (not birth - thanks Anne!) certificate from Thyme so I can't wait to fit into maternity clothes so I can try things on! Everyone says it's such a great feeling when you can finally fit into maternity clothes because they are super comfy... I can't wait!

Maisie

No, I don't have pictures but she is gorgeus. Absoloutely gorgeus.

It was the first time being in the hospital (childbirth center) since we found out we were pregnant and I looked at it completely different then any other time. There were tons of new parents there, visiting, smiling, and cuddling the newest addition to the family. It brought tears to me eyes, and I kept whispering to Jeff - this will be us in December. What a strange feeling.

The thing I'm most scared about is the epidural. It's the part where you have to stay completely still. If someone is going to run an electric shock through my spine, I can't imagine being able to stay still. I'm scared shitless about it. The rest of it, I think I can deal with. I don't want to obsess over it for the next 6 months, but knowing me, I will.

My kissing cousins have requested that I post pictures, so unfortunately, I will post pictures hopefully this weekend. Keep in mind, I don't look pregnant, just fat.

Row row row your bloat....

My clothes fit me in the morning, but by 4pm they just barely fit! Before I got pregnant, my weight would fluctuate about 3-4 lbs a day but now it must be about 7. Again, because Jeff got rid of the scale, I can't be positive, but I'm pretty sure.

The baby is the size of a lime today, it has pigment in it's eyes, and it's legs are getting longer. I don't like referring to the baby as an it - but, I can't say he or she. Deep down, I have the feeling it's a boy, but we won't know until he/she pops out!

Julie and Tim welcomed a new baby daughter into their world yesterday - Maisie! We didn't go see them last night cause Jeff and I are both getting over a cold - but tonight we will make it out there. I want to stop off at a spa first and buy Julie some little goodies.

Not much else to report - had a brutal headache last night, got into bed around 7:30 and finally had to take Tylenol around 5am (dont tell Dr. Ghattas). Mom gave me this lavender pillow thing you can warm up and put over your eyes, last night was the first night I warmed it up and did it ever feel wonderful. I made Jeff call her and thank her for doing it :)

Longggg weekend

My in-laws came in from PEI last Wednesday, stayed with us for a few days and we all left for Toronto Friday morning for my brother in law's wedding.

It was a great weekend (lots of shopping, family visits, food etc....) but boy am I tired today!

I turned the big 3-1 yesterday and it was the worst birthday ever. Ok, that was a bit of an exageration. I was just longing to be at home, and we only got home from Toronto around 9. I was in bed at 9:15 and just grumpy. No one should spend their birthday in a car.

So my wonderful husband told me today was my birthday too.

I had a dr's appt this morning, only gained 2 lbs since my last visit (so a month ago) and only a total of 6 lbs since I got pregnant, but up about 18 since last November (I gained a whole bunch over Christmas). Oh well - my goal to not hit 200 is still within view and I am positive I won't gain that much.

There was blood in my urine at my last appt, so he ran the test again and it came out fine. All the other tests were good, so I got the thumb's up that everything seems on the up and up so far. That's the last time I'll see my regular doctor, next time I meet with my obstetrician, on June 22nd. Then I'll be having my first ultrasound - so very excited for that.

I can't remember if I have commented on my acne on here yet. I have always had pretty good skin, never acne, I can't even remember the last time I had a pimple. Now? It's insane - I have them all over, my face is so oily and I'm all blotchy. It's yucky. I am being pretty good to my skin now, I exfoliate (but not with an abrasive exfoliant, it's a non-abrasive) and have been using this amazing Aveda cream (super $$ but my face is worth it) so it's not as bad today.... but everyone says your skin is wonderful during pregnancy... mine isn't!!

Almost gone....

My cold is fading slowly, now I'm just left with the runny nose and a cough.

Things to note:
1/ Jeff parents and aunt & uncle arrive tonight
2/ Jeff and Ricky and Peter finished off the railing for the deck last night and it looks AWESOME
3/ My mom is a super star and cleaned my house for me! She even tidied up the 'nursery' which was slowly becoming "the room to put things in when they dont belong anywhere else" including the closet! It's all organized now!
4/ I couldn't sleep last night but am surprisingly feeling well rested today
5/ Am making my grammie's infamous 'pineapple dessert' for the visitors (ok, for me too)
6/ Having a big BBQ tomorrow night, it was forecasted as rain but now it looks like 21 with scattered showers, I'll take that!

None of that was pregnancy related, but I haven't been reading much lately (no time, or no energy) so I'm not sure what's going on in this tummy of mine.

I am wearing a size 13 pant today, but they are super baggy. I just bought new brown sandals, and I wanted to wear them today so I had to wear brown pants and the only clean/nice ones were these - so here I am.

Definitely have a tummy now (enhanced tummy I should say, I've had a tummy since I was 6) but I can tell the rest of me is getting a bit bigger too (my arms, legs etc...) most likely due to the lack of exercise, but that's stopping as soon as I am sick. Err.... I should stay starting. It's the LACK of exercise that's stopping, not the exercise itself. Next week I'm getting my bike ready to go biking and Jeff and I started taking nightly walks (getting lots of ideas for the front walk, flowers, etc...)

Still sick....

It got worse - it's in my head, my nose, my chest - everywhere!

I got into bed at 7, slept on and off all night - a brutal headache, my nose is running like Tarrah will be in the 1/2 marathon and my throat is raw from coughing.

I have Thursday and Friday off (in-laws coming from PEI then going to Toronto for my brother in law's wedding) so I can't exactly call in sick - so here I am at work, dying a slow and painful death.

I miss my over the counter drugs.

Looking at my posts

It seems all I do is complain!

Just before I start being positive, I have to vent about my getting Jeff's chest cold! I cough every minute and I gag at the end of it, so needless to say it's tons of fun!

Besides that though, I am doing well. Didn't get too much sleep this weekend and I feel OK today, maybe I have kicked the tired feeling.

Everyone came over Saturday night and I spent quite a while with 2 month old Justen and I felt completely at ease. It's the first time holding a wee one that I didnt' freak out and think - I won't be able to do this! I felt comfortable, I felt ready, I can't wait for December.

But, as per the advice of mom's, I am definitely taking advantage, and enjoying the time before the little one comes! Sleep will soon be a thing of the past, so I'm doing as much as I can now :)

!@(*^&@#$*^ Headaches!!!!

Yesterday afternoon it came and didn't leave till I went to bed at 11. I woke up this morning and I can feel it behind my eyes again, but I'm going to do everything in my power to not let it come back full force.

I forgot to read the pregnancy journal this morning, so I can't give any updates on the baby.

Feeling pretty good though (headache aside) but I'm hungry and absoloutely NOTHING is appealing to me right now to eat. I have been having this problem almost ever since I got pregnant - I am hungry, but I don't want to eat anything. I am digging pickles and popsicles though (not necessarily together) but I've always liked both so they aren't "new".

I have to try on this sweet black dress (well, tank top and skirt) to see if I fit in it and it looks good to wear to the wedding next weekend. I have another dress taht I wore to a wedding a few years ago, I absoloutely LOVE it but I wore it when I was about 20 lbs lighter but it may still look OK. I better try them on soon cause if I don't like either, I'm going to have to go shopping!

Saturday night, we are having people over to celebrate Julie and my birthday (both turning 31... eek!) but Jules is about 2 weeks away from having her second child and she feels like it's coming soon so who knows if it will be cancelled or not.

It's raining though (BOO!) so the new patio won't be enjoyed - but the SENS game is on so mostly everyone would be inside anyways!

TGIF, I couldn't handle another day.

Back at work....

I called in sick yesterday, I woke up with a horrible headache and after talking to my doctor, he advised me NOT to take any Tylenol, so I just took it easy at home and it eventually went away.

I went out for dinner with some friends and got my first baby present - it was a Curious George touch and feel book, it made me teary! Thanks Kerri :)

The baby is about the size of a green olive (Horrible comparison because I hate olives) and yesterday I had to wear my first size 12 pants. I only got dressed around 5, and was already fully bloated by that point. These days it's all about being comfortable, so I put on the 12s and went on my merry way (cursed and swore under my breath....). I wish I had lost about 15 lbs before I got pregnant, I would have more clothes that would fit me for longer. But I can't turn back time so I will just deal with it. And cry.

I think...

My weight gain has slowly tapered off, I think I may have just gained that first 5 lbs right off the bat and now I'm OK for a bit...

My clothes are still fitting me (not my skinnier clothes) and it's good that my weight has fluctuated so much over the years because now I have clothes ranging from size 6 to 10. I had to buy a few pairs of size 12 pants but that will be towards the middle - end of the summer I hope :)

I went to the Sens game last night (they ALWAYS lose when I go to the game) , we had seats in the 2nd row in Level 100 and I was RIGHT BESIDE the Sens players box so I could see them so up close - it was great. Except, when the puck was at the other end of the rink it was hard to see. Jeff and I joked that I should go up to Chris Phillips (who was blocking my view) and politely ask him to sit down.... I doubt that would go over so well :)

Anyways, the point of all this - we ran into one of Carrie's friends who always arranges our Girls Night Out! And found out she's pregnant... with TWINS! I just about died. I haven't had an ultrasound yet so I don't know what lies in store for us but I'm hoping for a single baby inside. I saw what Carrie went through and while I love those twins to death, the first two years are pretty much insane! I think my hands will be full enough with one baby let alone two.

Note to self: Call doctor today to cancel IPS and ask about headaches (I've been getting one a day for the past week and it sucks)

But I have to use my cell phone and go outside to call the doctor because only one person here at work knows I'm pregnant and we are in cubicles (oh joy) so everyone can hear everyone else talk - that would be a sure fire way of letting the cat out of the bag.

3 more weeks and then I will tell them.

Acid Reflux?

Never, until now, have I known what a horrible infliction this is to have! Jeff always complains about acid reflux and pops a few Rolaids every few days but I never quite understood what a nasty nasty thing it is to have.

Apparently, a side effect of being pregnant is an increase in aid reflux. And boy is it horrible! Last week I was craving greasy foods, so ate 2 big bags of ketchup chips over the span of a week. Saturday I woke up with this vile taste in my mouth and it lasted throughout the day. It clued into me what it probably was and I feasted on J's Rolaids for the rest of the weekend.

Yesterday morning it was gone, but then last night I ate about 10 cheesies so I had a Tums (had to buy a big bottle to keep with me) and this morning I am feeling much better.

The good thing about all this is now the idea of fried foods makes me nauseous cause I know what havoc it can bring!

I found out some great news! My sister who, in January, lost her baby at 5 months, told me she was pregnant and due January 1st!!! That's 3 weeks past my due date and I am ECSTATIC! Firstly, ecstatic that they are pregnant again, and more on a selfish note, ecstatic that I will have someone to play with for the whole year of my maternity leave! Someone to talk to who will be going through the exact same thing as me!

My only issue with this is Nadia is a perfect size 0. When she was pregnant last time she had this gorgeus pregnant belly and was one of those cute cute pregnant ladies. I am just getting fat - all over, and my always existant tummy is just getting bigger. So if we stand next to each other, they will think I am like 6 months past her! Tee hee, just kidding (well, kind of). I'll get over it :)

I have to post a picture of my tummy soon, it is definitely protruding some and I kind of like it.

9 weeks - only 31 left to go.

:)

I think I've been pretty lucky...

The one day I was sick, I think it was actually the flu. Besides that, I haven't been sick at all. Overall I have been feeling yucky but not that really nauseous feeling. Julie was sick almost 7 times a day for about 8 weeks and lost 15 lbs! I wouldn't mind losing teh weight (just kidding!) but the nausea I can live without.

Last night we ordered pizza (oops!) and right afterwards I felt really sick and I thought that karma was coming to get me (for telling Carrie and my mom that I was lucky I didn't have morning sickness), but I think it just may have been the pizza :)

I woke up with a bit of a headache and contemplated calling in sick, but I know there will be days where I will need it more so here I am at work.

The baby's nipples are formed today! That's the only thing I can remember from my journal this morning.

I have been having absoloutely crazy, insane, scary, wild dreams lately. Some of them are horrible (like I'm in a house where people are getting murdered) and some are just insane. But I am dreaming SO much each night, I wake up and remember like 4 or 5 different dreams. I should start writing them down but really they are so crazy I wouldn't know where to start or end.

I think I'll be going to Carrie's to watch the game tonight and visit with the kiddies.

Still in somewhat denial about being pregnant I think. I went and just started into the guest room which will be the nursery, trying to mentally place furniture and picture it as a nursery and I got butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. It seems so surreal.

Took a picture...

But I don't want to post it. If I don't like the way my body looks already, I cna't even imagine how I will feel in the coming months!

I will try to find a more flattering angle and post it. I am going to chronicle my weight gain (I don't think I used teh word chronicle correctly here) with pictures, one taken each month to show my ever expanding waist line.

It's actually not THAT bad right now, we are all our worst critics!

I have been craving red meat like crazy the last little while, so last night after the 3rd steak THIS WEEK I realize I may have to switch to another kind of meat. It just can't be good for you.

When I say craving, I don't know if it's just a regular craving or pregnancy craving. It sounds better if it's a pregnancy craving, so I will stick with that.

The baby's kidneys are making their way towards their final resting spot and they are beginning to secret urine! Isn't that insane??

Nothing new today....

The baby is the size of a peanut, about 1/2 inch long and will be straightening out within the next few days (until now it's been in a C-shape).

For anyone who gets pregnant, I highly suggest "The Pregnancy Journal", it gives a daily update on the baby, with nutritional tips and lots of great information. Jeff and I read it every morning (or that night) and it's a good update on what's going on inside of you.

EVERY morning Jeff asks if the baby is kicking yet. It's a joke between us now. This morning after I read the day's blurb, he asked me if they said anything about it kicking. I said no. I said that will happen around 20 weeks. He said ok... 20 weeks.... and I said, you are still going to ask me in the morning aren't you?

I love that man so much it's ridiculous.

The last few weeks have been rough, energy-wise. I have been so bloody tired that I've been unable to help out with so much around the house that I feel freaking useless! I'm normally never tired and will spends hours on end doing whatever it is I have to do, but now after an hour of laundry last night I had to stop and get into bed. I have heard your energy comes back in the second trimester, so I am looking forward to that.

Killer headache

The pain kept getting worse all night - I finally caved and took two Tylenol, it's still lingering this morning but not half as bad as it was yesterday/last night. Had a horrible sleep so I am exhuasted right now.

I think the majority of my bloatedness (I think I'm making words up) is gone, I fit back into a size 8 this morning with the elastic trick, but last week I wouldn't have been able to fit into these.

I tried going for a run last night but it didn't work out so well, so I walked instead. Didn't help with the headache situation, but at least I got out.

I've been browsing nursery themes for the past couple lunch hours, there are so many to choose from! The room right now is bright yellow and I've read in many different places that you should not paint your baby's room yellow so I think I will paint it a soft green - that will go with almost everything.

I've had two dreams now where I am pregnant with a boy, so just 7 more months till I know if my dreams are true or not :) Since deciding against IPS, I had a dream that I was at high risk. If my dream stresses me out, I can't imagine what the results of the test (if I were to have them done) would show. I heard that if your due date is off, it can skew the results of the IPS, and I think my due date is wonky cause of the length of my cycle, so I figure the results will be wrong and really, why stress myself out for so long thinking I am at high risk (which doesn't even mean the baby will have anything wrong with them) - we will deal with that when the time comes.

I am in love with the name Ryann for a girl (pronounced Ryan) and Jackson for a boy. I had a cat named Jackson but I love the name! I wanted Hannah for a girl, but Kaethe and Peter's dog is Hannah so that's out of the question - as soon as Julie and Tim have their baby, they will give me that great name book so we can seriously look into names!

I miss my pills...

I have a headache and I'm longing for an Advil. I think an after-work nap may take care of it. I have my running shoes and clothes by the front door, I am going to ATTEMPT a run, but settle for a walk tonight! With this weather, how could I not?

Nap will come after walk/run.

Sad and frusterated....

My running partner signed up for the half marathon, I'm a bit sad I won't be doing it this year. Yes, I know lots of people continue running while pregnant, I tried it once, it didn't feel right so I stopped. I said to myself, what's 9 months of not running when I can run for the rest of my life. But still, I'm a tad bummed.

Frusterated becuase my clothes no longer fit me. I think all my clothes fit me just right so now with a 5 lb gain, things are just too tight. I really wish I had held onto my fat clothes, they would be perfect right now! I have bought two pairs of 12 pants but they are still too big for me, I am at a horrible in between stage.

I'm in my 8th week and the baby is about 20 mm long. I wish I remember more of what I read in my pregnancy journal this morning so I could tell you more about it, but I was super tired so I will have to re-read it tonight.

I think we have decided to NOT go for the pre-natal integrated screening tests. I wouldn't want to have an amniocentesis, so what's the point of finding out I am high risk if I am not planning to do anything about it? But... then I won't have an ultrasound until 20 weeks :(

I have a coldsore and apparently you can't put on any topical cream so I'm trying Peter's method of putting nail polish remover on it... it stings a bit but I'll wait and see the progress by tomorrow and report back.