I find it quite strange...

That so many women say what a high priority it is to find a caregiver who takes their kids outside alot, yet they don't themselves?

I got Carson bundled up today with big socks, shoes, hat, mittens and spent over an hour outside. His cheeks were red and his nose was running by the time we got home :)

It may seem a little extreme...

But after a good long talk with Kate on Friday night, I've taken her suggestions at transitioning Carson into daycare life. I talked about Kate before, this is the same schedule they followed at GCCS when she worked at their daycare, and she has found it to work the best for Carson's age group.

Two weeks before I go to work:
Monday - Carson and I will go to the caregiver's for an hour in the morning. Kate says it's important for Carson to see me at the place where he will be spending his days, so it's not a scary place. Also, he needs to see me interacting with the caregiver so he knows that she is "safe".
Tuesday - Carson goes alone for 2 hours in the morning, I'll pick him up for his morning nap. It's important to establish early on that this house is for Carson, without mommy. If you spend any more time there with him, it will be that much harder when you leave.
Wednesday - same as Tuesday
Thursday and Friday - Carson goes in the morning + morning nap -I'll bring him home for lunch. Naps are a special time, so I'll be there to pick him up right after his nap. They are ultra sensitive when they wake up and it will be scary the first few times he wakes up and is greeted by a new person.

1 week before I go to work:
Monday - Carson goes in the morning and lunch and he takes his afternoon nap at home. Slowly add in more of his daily routine.
Tuesday and Wednesday- Carson goes in the morning, lunch and stays for his afternoon nap and I pick him up right afterwards
Thursday and Friday - Carson stays for the full day!

I have to go talk to our caregiver and run this schedule by her. It's important for her to know it's not because of HER but because of HIM. Kate says that normally the first week is pretty easy, it's new and fun. It's normally the second week where they start to figure out this is now part of their routine and that's when they may freak out (if they are going to, that is) so I really want to be at home for that second week (ie: not at work) so in case he really needs me, I'll be there. I wouldn't go if he was crying for a bit... he'd have to be in dire needs of me before I went over. He has to figure out that this is what's going to happen from now on. Ha, I say all this now - but I have NO idea how he's going to react when it happens. So far he's great with people he doesn't know... so I'm hoping it stays that way.

It's over already?

This weekend went flying by. There was a Hallowe'en "party" with slides, bouncy rooms and lots and lots of kids. Carson of course was just crawling around and looking at all the kids, mesmerized. Then Carson went to stay with Grandma and Nono so Jeff and I could go to the annual "Feast from the East". After talking with the people at our table, I realized Carson is a really really good baby (when are they no longer a baby and a "kid"?). He goes for days without crying and I thought that was normal, but apparently not? When everyone heard that he sleeps 12 hours a night plus 2 2hr naps, their jaws dropped. I guess that's not normal either? I love talking to other parents about dealing with kids in certain situations. I love hearing what the kids did and how the parents dealt with it. There was quite a bit of talk last night about kids sleeping with their parents, and how to ease them out of it. So if that ever happened (which Jeff and I swore we would never allow, but one of the things i've learnt since becoming a parent is some things you swear you would never do... you end up doing) it's nice to know how to deal with it. I love first hand experiences as opposed to books. All my friends are awesome for that.

I sat beside Shelley, who's husband (a good friend of Jeff's) passed away this June, and she has 3 kids: Declan (3), Makayla (2) and Finlay (7 mos). She has got to be the strongest, toughest, absolutely amazing woman I've ever met. I don't know how I would be surviving if I was in her position. I know you would have to, for the kids.... but really. She talks about how she juggles life, work, with her kids and it's amazing. Whenever I feel stressed, overworked, overtired, exhuasted, I am going to picture her and know that my life is easy.

Today we took a drive out to Kanata to look at houses and visit with Dwight and Lyne. Carson just sat with Dwight for a good 20 minutes (right in front of Jeff and I and didn't even make a move towards either of us) then he played with Mocha (their dog) and explored their house and loved Sienna's room the most. He didn't nap this afternoon because of the visit, but you wouldn't have even known it, he was as happy go lucky as he normally is. This week is super busy, filled with lots of trips to stores to return things, having Carrie, Rob and the kids over for dinner on Hallowe'en, a playdate, a swimming date, and a shopping date. It's 5 weeks until I go back to work and so many things to do!

Oh, and it's Carson's 1st birthday coming up. We were going to have a joint birthday with Ethan and Isabelle (their's is the day before) but apparently he needs his own birthday. Now the planning begins. It's not going to be a huge deal, probably do an "open house" type of invite because lots of people are anxious to see the little guy on his big day. I may even try to make a cake (I have never made a cake from scratch before! Anyonw has a really good simple cake recipe (with icing), send it my way!) The party will be on his actual birthday and I start work 2 days later...

Days are numbered

Our days at the park are numbered, so we have been spending lots of time there. Carson is fearless. He climbs right up the stairs and goes headfirst down the slide, without even looking to see where I am. In this video we kind of have to prompt him because he had done it a bunch of times before before Jeff thought to tape it.

Gotta keep an eye on him..

If you turn your head for a second, he's off and away and into something else. He's super quick and fast and a curious little monkey. He wants to see and touch everything, he wants to know what everything does and wants to do everthing that Jeff and I do.

Poor little boog

Boog is right! His runny nose and cough is still there and if I put my hand on his back I can hear it's all congested. I called the doctor and asked if I could bring him in today and now I'm waiting to hear back. His demeanor hasn't changed, he's still as happy as ever, sleeping the same (although he was up a bit early, 6:30 today), but this cold is just not going away. And hearing his chest makes me wonder if there's not more to it. I've stayed away from all medication (because he doesn't seem to be too affected, I never used the cold and sinus medicine before anyways, just the regular old Advil and Tylenol) but he's just not getting better.

Update: I just talked to the doctor's office and she said it sounds like he's doing just fine - if he wasn't able to sleep or eat or had a fever, they would want to see him. But to offer more water (he drinks a ton of water, and I always offer it before a bottle), and if he has problems sleeping to just prop up his mattress a bit and if he's awake due to his cough I could give him the purple dimetapp. So I feel way better and we'll take it easy today - easy to do with the rain. The last few days we spent hours in the park and today he'll miss it cause of the rain. Boo.

Daddy is SO proud

Like I said, tonight we were having a steak dinner. I never really follow the rules when it comes to what to feed Carson and when. Sure I try and respect the big things like fish and peanuts... but other then that, whatever I think he'd like (sugar aside) I give him some. He always wants what we are eating these days... so who are we to deny him a big steak bone?

To say he enjoyed it would be an understatement. He chewed on that bad boy for a good half hour, he cried when I took it away and he ended up being a huge greaseball like Grampie Walker! He certainly put on a show for everyone too!

First non-grandparent sleepover

Last night we dropped Carson off at Carrie and Rob's around 5. We stayed and hung out for a little bit, giving Carrie "instructions" (very loose instructions about when he'll eat, go to bed etc..) and saying bye to Carson. Even though he's too young to put two and two together, I don't like the idea of sneaking out - tricking him per se, in order to get away without a scene. So we gave hugs and kisses, said goodbye, and his lip came out so Carrie took him downstairs with Isabelle to look for some toys.

Jeff and I were off. I kept wanting to call to see how it was going, but everyone convinced me to wait until after he would be in bed. I just wanted to be reassured that he wasn't upset and being a nightmare! I finally called Carrie around 8:30, and yes, he was pretty sad for about 45 minutes. He'd be OK and playing with the kids, then start to look around for us, and we weren't there so he'd cry. Then he would be distracted again and be happy, then notice we still weren't there and be a little sad. But everyone was singing and playing with him, so he eventually gave in and decided it was fun there. He didn't really eat his dinner but happily munched on some cut up pear and some goldfish crackers. After hearing all this, my heart was a little sad knowing that he had been sad but then Kate convinced me how good it is for Carson to get exposure to different people, and this is his aunt and uncle and cousins who love him more than anything!

(god I wish I could crumple Kate into a little ball and carry her around with me at all times, she's the most fantastic caregiver in the world. We've been friends since Grade 7 and she's gone for her ECE and for a degree in child studies, worked at 4 different daycares and now is working with kindergartens and is a wealth of knowledge when it comes to raising kids and everything that comes out of her mouth makes absolute sense to me. I know all mothers have different thoughts on how to raise children and Kate and I are on the exact same page, every book she's ever recommended to me is brilliant!)

He went to bed without a hitch and slept through until 7 this morning. I of course, no matter how late we were out last night, couldn't sleep past 5 (been waking up so early for bootcamp for the past week) so finally around 7 I got dressed and was out the door, on my way to Tim's for coffee and timbits for the "babysitters" and at their door before 8. Carson was in the booster seat, happily eating some fruit, looking at Bailey (the dog) - he looked over and saw me. Kicked his feet and a huge smile for his mom, but then went back to looking at Bailey and singing while he ate. So yes he was happy to see me, but he was quite happy where he was too!

Which made me SO happy. I want Carson to be comfortable around other people, I don't want him to know only his mom and dad and to not want to be around others. I want him to want to learn new things, sleep in new places and be comfortable with change. We have a routine here at home, but if we stray from that routine I don't want him to be all out of whack and not able to deal. I love that I can let him go for a sleepover and not be a nervous wreck all night. I love knowing in my heart that if anything happened and I needed to drop Carson off any family member that he wouldn't scream for 24 hours until I came back. What kind of fun is that? I love that I am confident in myself as a mom to not feel like I'm abandoning him, or being a bad mother for wanting a night out. It has nothing to do with being away from him, and everything to do with being with my friends, my husband, adult conversation and lots of laughs. Above all, I'm LUCKY that we are surrounded with family who want to spend time with Carson. We wish all his grandparents and aunts/uncles/cousins lived here too though. Jeff and I were talking about looking around our neighbourhood for teenagers that babysit too - in the next year or so I think it would be great to have someone around that could come by for a few hours if Jeff and I wanted to get out. I'd feel most comfortable with someone in the area who had their parents nearby... just in case of emergencies. I was babysat as a child, I babysat when I was a teenager, so why the heck wouldn't I think it would be good enough for Carson?

He had a 3 hour nap this morning (I called Carrie and asked her is she drugged him) and is going onto hour 2 of his afternoon nap. I can't imagine how much he will get tired out when he can actually walk! I'm always happy when he sleeps ton, in my crazy little mind I think it has to do with how much fun/learning/exercise we get while he's awake!

Mom and Dad night out...

That's right - Jeff and I are going out for the night with some friends (Happy Birthday Tim!) so Carson is headed over to Auntie Carrie and Uncle Rob's for a sleepover. I'm sure Ethan and Isabelle are excited to have their cousin over and even though Carson doesn't know it yet, he will love spending time with them. He loves kids.

Carson's had a bit of a cold this week and he sounded raspy and coughing lots yesterday but he's been in good humour and still sleeps through the night, so unless he takes a turn for the worse, he's still going. And I know he's in good hands!

He's listening!

I've been talking to Carson since he was born. I tell him everything. I describe what I'm doing, what I see, what he's eating, what I'm thinking, and everything in between. I just like him hearing my voice, hearing words, hearing conversation.

Anyways, like I said before, he's been going up the stairs for a couple of months now. The issue is always going down the stairs. Whenever he edges towards the stairs (and would start to go head first if I didn't try to stop him) I always say "We don't go down the stairs like that, we turn around and put our legs first, not our hands". But then I physically turn him around and help him down the stairs that way.

Tonight him and I were playing upstairs in the hallway and chasing each other from room to room. He quietly made his way towards the stairs and I said "Carson let's stay upstairs" and that's ALL I said. He looked at me and then he turned around and went down two stairs. On his own. Without me saying it. Without me physically doing it for him. I was in shock. I yelled to Jeff to come. It was the first thing that he's done that I've taught him! It was amazing.

Sure he drinks from his sippy cup, he has fantastic dexterity and picks things up, turns them over in his hands, gives kisses - but all of those just come naturally. I didn't have to really teach him any of it (ok, maybe the kisses part)... but this, for some reason it really just amazed me.

I knew it was just a matter of time...

Before Carson found my nose piercing... owwww!

Poor little punkin has come down with a runny nose and sneeze. Not a bad cold yet, but he may be on his way. It wasn't a fun afternoon, but it did involve lots of snuggles.

I can't help myself

Honestly, he is the CUTEST thing these days that all I want to do is show his pictures to everyone. He's so fricking funny too. And smart. He knows where the fan, ball, truck, water (sippy cup), book, upstairs, downstairs, grandma, nono and mommy and daddy are. It's amazing. He plays catch (or rather toss), he crawls onto my lap to read a book, he gives KISSES (to me! I just realized that yesterday and he came towards my mouth with his mouth wide open and what did I do? Cried. Cause I didn't know he could do that) and he snuggles again. He lays his head down on both Jeff and I's chest and snuggles. It's the best feeling in the world. And he plays. Boy does he ever play.

Looking for...

Baby gates!

We have one of the plastic extendable (not sure if that's a word or not) ones that are pressure mounted. Carson is pretty freaking strong and he shakes that gate like it's nobody's business. It's just a matter of time before it gives out. So we are looking for the gates that are hardware mounted. One of the women we interviewed for daycare got two really nice dark brown ones (to match the railings in her house) at Direct Buy. My brother is a member of Direct Buy so I think I'll ask him if he can get me some. She said to buy it elsewhere is 1 gate for $120 and at Direct Buy you can get 2 for $140! I've been looking on usedottawa, kijiji and craigslist (my regulat stomping grounds) but haven't really found what I am looking for yet. And time is of the essence.

Seeing as it's going to be somewhat nice today, we are going to go to the park, walk to the grocery store and maybe squeeze in a trip to Walmart to return a few things I bought last week before realizing I didn't really need them.

Carson and his cousins

I'm not a fan of Winnie the Pooh stuff (at ALL) but this jacket came with a pair of pants and was regulat $45 on sale for $7. I can never resist a sale! But really, doesn't he look like he's about 4 years older with the jacket and hat on?

Last night we went over to Mom and Ricky's for some dinner with the twins (who were having a sleepover) and Nadia, Sean and Sofia. It's so much fun having cousins the same age, and older then him. I find around the older kids, he already tries to do more things that he wouldn't try when he's by himself.

Lots of time to post..

Cause the little goob has been sleeping so much! He's been sleeping 13 hour nights with 2 2-3 hour naps during the day. Now that I've found daycare and my job situation is figured out, I have some free time. Also, the house is clean, laundry is done, dinner is prepped, so really... I can honestly say I have "nothing" to do. Sure I have a little to-do list, but after such a crazy week I'm more than happy to sit and relax while Carson is taking his afternoon nap. When he gets up, we are all set to get bundled up and go for a super long walk. So for now, I'm drinking some tea and talking about my favourite thing.

Carson. I plan on enjoying every last day him and I have together for the next month and a half. Now that the major things are out of the way, all I have to concentrate on is him and I. And doing as much as we can together.

Today wasn't super exciting, after his 2 1/2 hour nap we went to Walmart to get a few things, came back for lunch and he's back in bed. Here are some pictures while we were getting ready to go out. He looks like he's 5 years old! And if you think I post too many pictures, well stop reading then. (I'm trying to figure out how to take the best pictures with my camera, so excuse the shoddy job sometimes)

I love it

When he uses my leg to pull himself up into a standing position, puts one arm on either leg, his head between my legs and tries so hard to climb up me because he wants up.

It's the cutest thing ever.

Carson crawling upstairs is pretty cute too. He's been crawling up the stairs since he was 9 months old... I tell ya, we are in for a world of trouble with this little guy!

Four times a charm!

Four interviews later and I think we found the absolute perfect person to help us raise Carson. She's sweet, she's young, her house is completely dedicated to children (and she doesn't have any of her own yet, she just got married this summer), she lives right around the corner from us, Carson loved her, she loves being outside, serves healthy foods, seems to know everything about the children she takes care of now and we both just had that feeling when we left her house.

Turns out it's a good thing my mother loves to talk. She's been going to the same place to get her hair cut for about 6 or 7 years. Sitting beside her regular hairdresser is this really cool young woman (who actually cut my hair a month after I had Carson) who my mom chats with. I'm not sure how it came up, but somehow she found out that this lady's sister has a little girl who goes to daycare to a woman in Riverside South who her sister absolutely LOVES! So my mom asked for the name/number and gave it to me, I called this morning, got an interview for 5 tonight and we knew as soon as we left that she's the one.

So yay. A new job and we found daycare all in one week. I feel to have this huge weight lifted from my shoulders....

Just cause I can.

A snuggle from my good luck charm before my interview (which ended with a new job for me, so he IS my good luck charm)

Hanging out this morning, making his growling noise:

He LOVES music and always goes straight to the stereo when I turn the music on every morning. He now knows that the buttons DO things.

He LOVES his toast. When I ask him if he wants toast, he crawls to his highchair.

Just sitting around, playing with his toys while mommy is in the kitchen

Interview #3

Didn't go too well either. Lots of reasons (again)

1/ She was older. I would rather have a young mother chasing after my son. Think of me what you wish.

2/ I like seeing a house with toys scattered all over (much like mine)

3/ The playroom was the basement, bare walls and just didn't look cosy.

4/ The backyard wasn't fenced in

I have a few more leads (every day I get more) so yay! Even less stressed today.

Carson and Sofia on Thanksgiving. Yes Carson is in the flowery highchair. Yes, Sofia is frowning at me (she was giving me the GREATEST faces that day) and yes Carson is cute as hell (I knew you were going to say it anyways). What a complete and utter joy he is these days. It's killing me to find someone to take care of him when I go back to work, but when I see him with other kids and chasing them around and playing with them I know that daycare is what's going to be best for him.

Daycare Interview #2

Went really well! Through a licensed agency, she's a new mom (Kiera is 1) and couldn't fathom going back to work. She's super nice, she's speaks French (which is great, I want Carson to learn French), and part of me always wanted someone as new to the game as I am. So we could learn together. Who knows, I could be totally off the ball on this one (some people might think they want someone who's been doing it for a long time so they know exactly what to do) but, references would be nice.

I still want to interview more people, I got a really good feeling from her, but what if there is someone better? I have a few calls in, and hopefully will talk to a few ladies tomorrow (wait, not tomorrow, tomorrow is INSANE) ... at least I'm not as stressed.

Heh - Carson is giggling now. He's been laughing and smiling for a while, but only if we did something to make him laugh. Now when we walk into his room after his nap he giggles. If we look at him funny he giggles. He pushes this funny ball around and giggles. He sees himself in the mirror and giggles. It's hard to explain, but it's something new, adorable, sweet and completely makes my heart warm and fuzzy.

Pumpkin Patch

I have to start learning how to use my camera outside, the light is horrible! But he was so darn cute.

This was taken seconds ago

After the first peek of the night. Jeff didn't want me to take the picture, but Carson didn't flinch. And, the room IS dark :)

In the morning...

Things are always better! Nothing new to report on the daycare front, but as I said I would, I feel fine in the morning.

I was talking to a friend this morning about what foods I'm feeding Carson, and I was thinking that it's so much easier to feed Carson now that I'm feeding him everything and anything. Well, no sweets or juice or anything like that, but all meats, veggies and bread/potatoes/rice. And because Jeff and I are always eating very healthy dinners, I have no doubts about blending up whatever we are eating and giving it to the little guy. He's getting his taste of all different types of foods and he's enjoying it. Sure, there are some he wants nothing to do with, but overall he's digging "real people" food. It's an easy way to keep eating healthy - I wouldn't dare try to blend some chicken fingers and fries :) And I'm lazy and don't want to have to cook two different meals.

Thanks Anne

For the comment. Thank you.

No go on the daycare...

Our first interview was today. Now, think what you like, but this is MY blog and I can say what I want about the kind of care I want for Carson. She was sweet and someone I would use as a babysitter, but not for full time care. There are a few reasons:
1/ She was young (mid 20's maybe). No daycare experience. She was a nanny for 11 months, but no ECE or daycare experience.
2/ A single mom of a 6 month old (and I was raised by a single mom so don't think I have anything against them) Her son's name? Carson (this had NOTHING to do with why we didn't go with her, just thought I should point it out. I haven't heard of any kids around his age with his same name)
3/ She was taking on 4 more kids. The oldest? 17 months. To me - that's ALOT. 5 kids under the age of 2??
4/ We asked where Carson would sleep. She said they would be sleeping in a room with a bed and two playpens. I'm sorry but I don't think 3 - 1year olds are going to sleep in the same room.
5/ She was charging MORE then the licensed daycare.

I came home and broke into tears. I just lost it. Not because the first interview wasn't the girl we decided to go with. More so because everything was just falling into place and this was the first stumbling block. I just came home and snuggled with Carson, was reading him a book and the tears started flowing. Maybe I was too confident thinking that I'm OK with this. But when I went out, and started to actually talk to people who potentially could be helping me raise my child, it freaked me out. I'll be OK tomorrow, I have 4 more interviews set up and I'm going to keep on making more. I've got the word out with quite a few people who are also asking around for me, so I know something will come up. I will just have this uneasy feeling in my stomach until I do.

Cute....

I just went and peeked (my third time of the night) and he's lying flat on his back in the star position. Arms and legs wide out. He looks like he's 5 years old.

I covered him with his blanket, stared at him for a few more minutes and left.

Eek - nervous!

So tomorrow is my first meeting with a woman who has space available in a home daycare in Riverside South. Get this - her son's name is Carson.

Her ad was the first one that really clicked with me. Healthy meals, lots of indoor and outdoor time and the name was "Little Adventures". Anyways, I know you can't "judge a book by it's cover" but I am really hoping to get a good feeling from her tomorrow. I thought I was prepared for this. I have a long list of questions, but now I'm trying to make sure I covered everything. I doubt I'll even ask all of them - if we get along I'm sure the conversation will flow and all my questions will be answered in our conversation. At least I'm hoping :)

I have 4 interviews scheduled in the next week and a half so I'll at least feel a little better, like there IS hope out there.

I'm looking forward to going back to work. For me. But I'm not looking forward to the part of leaving him with someone else. For the whole day. I do spend lots of ME time, but it's normally after he goes to bed. You become quite the pair, he's like my better half right now, he's attached at the hip and I like having him there. But I'm also ready to start my new role - of a working mother. I will wear the title with pride but will miss my little boy.

My sweet little boy

Is 10 months today! Ten.whole.months! I feel like I've said it all in the past month, so here are pictures. Yes, I know, I don't post enough pictures :)

Oh yeah - he goes down slides now! It's pretty cute. I met a woman in the park today, and she gave me the name and number of this woman that she always sees in the park with the kids she looks after. The woman I met had originally started talking to her because in a year or so she'll be looking for care for her little guy, Rowan. She said this woman is fabulous with the kids, and always in the park. Which is fantastic. So she gave me her name and number, because I told her I was looking for care and I will be calling tonight. I've gotten a few leads, but I'm a bit picky of who I want looking after him so each lead so far has one or two things I'm not keen about, but won't get into it on here as I don't want to offend anyone!

Anyways, here are the pictures of my gorgeus little boy and what we've done today so far on his "birthday". Hugs and Kisses to Grammy and Grampy!